As Northern economic policies shift in a seemingly positive direction—promoting free education, healthcare, taxes on capital, and the well-being of citizens—a familiar alienation persists. It often targets women and those associated with womanhood. The narrative within this capitalistic framework, even one that claims to protect, insists that we are victims of patriarchy and thus, victims of sex work.
The proposed solution? Our work must be regulated, our clients criminalized, and we must be reformed, “therapized” out of our chosen profession.
It is a profound contradiction that a system meant to empower, to lower poverty and promote autonomy, can in the same breath strip away a woman’s right to choose their own labor—and how they activates that labor power, to put it in Marxist terms.
How can these opposites exist at once? The answer, stripped bare, is misogyny. Reframed to look like support, it is simply a newer form of policing that dog whistles, “You don’t know what’s right for you, but we do.”
This is a tale as old as time. We see it in the histories of women who could not own property, divorce, be heirs, or possess wealth. We see it in the denial of education and the right to vote. It is the practice of granting small bits of access to simulate liberation while keeping the strings attached. We remain marionettes.
The stigma around sex work has always baffled me, especially as an artist. Before I entered sex work, I made art that simulated orgies or involved stripping my clothes off. This was celebrated as expression. To do the same thing when it’s labeled “sex work” suddenly makes it taboo.
Or consider a simpler social contract: a man at a club buys drinks, pays for a meal, and operates on the implicit expectation that his financial investment culminates in sex. This is often seen as normal. But if a woman explicitly states the terms—if you do these things, on our agreed terms, you will be fucked and fucked well—that is deemed unclean. Taboo.
Taboo comes from the Tongan word Tabu or Tapu, meaning sacred or forbidden. (This word exists in many Oceanic languages). The colonist and noted cultural destroyer, Captain James Cook, introduced it to English, where it came to reference social and religious customs.
What fascinates me is the word's multiplicity. It can mean something reserved for certain people, something repulsive, something precious, or something spiritual. These meanings are relative, especially repulsion, which is informed by upbringing, culture, and social codes.
This is precisely why sex work is important, and why its “tabu” nature is to be embraced, not regulated by government or stigmatized by the public—or even by those who buy it. Sex work is a practice for a specific group. It is sacred because, through our autonomy, we choose the services we give, we set their value, we select our clients, and we dictate the terms of engagement. It is a viable, sane, and spiritual profession and should be acknowledged as such.
To the government, to clients, to the general public: when you engage with a sex worker, understand that we possess an astute knowledge of ourselves, our capacity, our value, and our boundaries. We do not need to be regulated, nor do our clients need to be criminalized for investing in that sacredness.
We are human beings.
We are capable.
We are not victims.
💋Lore
